Xmen lesson #23..Shape shifting!......Shift your lives for the better!

Now I know you've all seen the movie, even the ones who don't enjoy movies (losers) have seen or at least had a friend tell you all the good parts. I personally love the Xmen trilogy for the simple fact that they have the most amazing powers of all the "super hero" movies I've seen, and it's spread out among the cast, so if your like me and get tired of watching a whole movies about one person (e.g Superman), you have a whole school of mutants, waiting to show you what you can do. Now the main man is of course "Charles Xavier" the co-founder of the school, and his goal was to teach the mutants to control their powers! Now we may not have powers, but we could learn a thing or two from his motives.

Lesson #1. We've all heard of the secret, and it's not a joke! as you go back in time you'll find people have been trying to explain these laws of the universe to us in lamens terms, and most of us are just to stubborn to realize it. Examples of this would be, "what goes around comes around", "do unto others as you would have done unto you", I could find a zillion examples, but I'm sure you get the drift. It's honestly that simple, if you wake up pissed, and give everyone your pissed off attitude, you will only attract more piss (get it lol)!, The same goes for attracting other people's negative energy, if you hear someone complaining about something, and your sitting there agreeing with them, and even giving them more discouraging advice, guess who's gonna be the next one complaining".

Lesson #2. Stop complaining, and start saying "THANK YOU". Whether you believe in God, or Allah, or don't believe in anything at all, you have to believe that someone or something is responsible for your being here on earth (not just your parents), and if that person, god or thing can make you, you better believe it can break you!

Lesson #3. Visualize!, have you ever seen something so close you could touch it, even feel the joy of it, but your not even there yet. A good example of this would be putting in overtime at work, you know it's hard work , and it's tedious, but oh the joy you feel when you think of all the money you'll have to spend, that vacation you've been waiting for, or my personal favorite .....a new pair of shoes! You basically know it's yours before you even buy it, and the same should be applied to your life. Visualize that car, house, dog or cat, kids, and even husband and wife, and somehow it will come to you. Hell I don't even know how I made it this far on my own, but I know it's not the end, cause I can "VISUALIZE" more ahead of me!

Lesson #4. When in doubt SHAPE SHIFT YOUR MENTALITY! The minute you feel yourself feeling down about something, you need to immediately change that thought, because it will attract more bad thoughts almost immediately. Have you ever been late for work, and your like awww not again, and then the metro stops, and your like what else can go wrong, then you get outside and it's raining?! Ummmm hmmmm, that's what I'm talking about, change your thoughts. If I'm running late, I say " Well at least I look good today" lol! Another tactic I have, is I make a "Shift list", this is a list of all the things that make me smile so hard, I know it will immediately transform my mood. Examples of things on my shift lists are, watching a commercial Pookie made on my camera (It's hilarious), or watch a comedy video. These things work! not everything will work for each mood, so if one thing on your list doesn't work, move on to the next.

I'll leave you with these kind parting words:
1. The best things in life aren't things.
2.Most of the things we worry about, never happen
3. Work hard, and be nice to people
4. Be happy for this moment, for this is your life.
5. Trust yourself
6. Life isn't about finding yourself, It's about CREATING yourself!
7.No one is going to love you if you don't love yourself...period!
8. If opportunity doesn't knock, build a door.
9. Remember that the end of one thing, can also be the start of something better!

and last but not least.

10. Tie your shoes, pack a lunch, and remember that we're all in this together!

Runaway Love

Have you ever felt like going ...no running (as fast as you can), to a place no one can find you? Free from all the judgmental people in the world constantly evaluating your progress vs their own. Somewhere where you can be the real person you want to be. Let's be honest, even the realest of us all, sometimes have to fake it. You can't just walk through life screaming "Fuck you" to every person who has ever made you feel bad about yourself or gives off a negative vibe. I feel that everyone should adopt the personality of Gemini's. Yea yea, everyone says we're two faced, but have you ever met a Gemini that has tried to deny the fact that they do have two personalities.

I love my personalities! I haven't named both of them, but if I had to one would be Chanelle (My actual name,) and the other would be Leah (My middle name). Chanelle is the one that is wreck less and rebellious, super social butterfly, changes her mind more often than not, and is constantly searching for excitement. Leah is the stable, responsible side, ambitious, and eager for love and a family. How on earth I balance the two I'll never know.

For example Chanelle has (at least 3 times), ran away from home, and even fled the country, eager to leave and experience something new, meet new people, (why she believed you could just pick up and move to a new country with no planning I'll never know). It wasn't disastrous per say, I loved the journey, but I'm right back where I started so I guess that mission failed. Every so often Leah will come with her level handedness when a guy of interest pops up, then here comes Chanelle looking for ways to interfere. There is no reasoning with Chanelle whatsoever, when she's pissed, she is PISSED, and can hold a grudge for days,. Leah will often in situations like this, try to apologize if necessary, but Chanelle is so convincing!

Leah is so compassionate and caring, loves all kids, and is so desperate to find a way to change the world, even if it's only by helping one child, or one person. I'll never forget the time she had a conversation with a homeless man at 3am waiting for the night bus after an evening with friends. (Let us disregard the fact that she was completely wasted, and no, she was not interested in sleeping with the homeless man) he simply seemed like he needed someone to talk to. Another time she listened to another stranger who found her attractive, while she clearly stated she had no interest in this man, he asked her if he could just get something off of his chest. This man talked about how he believed the devil was out to get him, and how he was on his way to his stripper girlfriends house, and the reason he was taking the metro was because he had crashed his car the week before and almost killed his stripper girlfriend ramming into a wall near the lachine canal. He admitted he was drunk and driving with his sunglasses on, but the devil kept telling him to go faster. By the time he was done with his story, the man was crying. (If this were Chanelle listening she would have told him get to steppin!), But Leah told him, this was a test from god, and now that he must use his feet as his sole means of transportation, he may as well follow in God's footsteps when he is need of direction. There is no GPS to heaven.

Needless to say the man gave her his number and Leah promised to call, but Chanelle never did. I find i interesting to see the battle between these two, and I strongly believe Leah will be the one to come out on top. I love Chanelle for her spontaneity and exciting nature, so open-minded, and fearless, with a walk that could make a mime scream!, and Leah for her level headed personality, common sense, and drive that has kept them both alive. While I struggle trying to balance the two, I can't help but wonder if it's possible that neither can truly live while the other survives.

The "L" word

As a child, the faintest memory I have is of my father telling me he loved me. He was never around due to "unforeseen circumstances" but he always managed to find a way to let me know. My mother on the other hand was the opposite, her love was proven in her actions, providing for us , and I guess being the mother and father, so in her mind she didn't have to say it, because we should have already known how she felt. This being said, I have always associated the word love with happiness and unconditional joy. This beautiful meaning soon went out the window.

When I began high school and had my first boyfriend, (which lasted nothing short of a week), he was telling me he loved me before he sealed the deal, then pretty much every other boyfriend throughout high school said the same thing. In my mind, how can you love someone you don't even know. I mean, yes it is possible to love "things" about people, but does this really give you the right to use the "L" word. Funny person I am, I never said it back, I couldn't care less if they screwed up their faces or hung up on me, No way was I going to just throw the word around.

The first time I said I love you, something told me I made a huge mistake. Not that I didn't love the guy, he ended up being my first and all that jazz, but It felt like I was saying it because I had to, we were together over a year, and did the deed, so why not seal the deal with the word right? wrong!
When it came time to prove it (difficult times), I pretty much just up and walked. I was like nope, I don't have to deal with this, let's just be friends.

This was my first lesson!, You can NEVER be "just friends" with someone you really love in that way. I learned that in my last relationship. I actually believe that I did love this guy. We lived together, both made mistakes, and time and time both forgave each other, by the time we decided to do right by each other, we were exhausted, and just didn't want to anymore. We said be friends, but you feel a certain, obligation after having slept with someone....am I right? I mean it's so easy to have sex one more time....for the last time. You both start to see other people, and our jealous, but for what, you don't want each other anymore.! and this alone starts up another huge fuss, and in the end I personally feel it isn't worth it.

The "L" word complicates things, and I'll be damned If I add more complications to my life. When I Love, I love hard and strong. Faithfully and unconditionally, and I expect no less. How can you say you love someone, but can't express emotion and affection. I'm talking PDA, hugs and kisses, and not acting hard in front of your boys, or your family. Love is patient, when she's having a rough day, and kind when it's that time of the patient. Unselfish, what's yours is hers, but not blind, to see when your getting played.

Love and Let Love my brotha's, I have faith in you all!

"You can't tell a woman you love her are you stupid? Words don't express your love you gotta prove it"-Papoose

Friendship is Blind.

This is one for my sista's!

Ladies oh ladies, why oh why must we obsess over men the minute they express interest in getting to know us. We talk about them constantly with our friends trying to find extra ways to woo these men, when the truth is if they weren't interested they wouldn't be here in the first place. Now seeing as it's summer time, you can barely walk down the street without seeing a couple smooching and holding hands, which obviously makes you yearn for "affection" as well. This is where we start to become delusional believing that "Any attention", is better than "No attention". This is due to the fact that
“A pleasant illusion is better than a harsh reality”. We would much rather believe that someone is madly in love with us, than actually open our eyes, and see that the same man is madly in love with every other female within a 50 mile radius. I know it sounds like I'm just another bitter black female but it frustrates me to see my friends and family constantly settle because they feel like they have to have someone to like. No one wants to be the SINGLE FRIEND.

I was like this at one point. Hell I still yearn every now and then, but when I take a look around at my options, I realize I'd rather wait than try to encourage the Ego's of these toddler's in adult bodies.
I would ask my friends opinion's on why they believe I'm still single and I got the typical answers "they're intimidated by you" or "just let it come to you". BAM! This is the problem ladies. Our friends sit our asses down and tell us what we want to hear! (Ever seen "He's just not that into you"?) Our friends have an influence over us that is sometimes blinding! If your friend goes to the gym, you want to go too!, If she gets a man, you want one too so you can double date.
I believe that a friend should be like a relative you've chosen for yourself, therefore the same way A family member will tell you how they feel regardless of how YOU feel, it should be that way with friends.

I pride myself on being the type of friend, who will lay it on you straight. If i think a guy is dogging you, I'll say it, and if you don't like it, go and cry about it to another friend, but my opinion is just that, my opinion! You can listen or leave it, but at the end of the day I just want what's best for the people around me. Men will come and go, and If I fall in love with a man, who cannot accept my friends...guess what?, PEACE HOMIE! Because in My friends I find myself, and the worst thing you can do in a relationship is lose yourself.

So to all my Summer Single Ladies, Instead of finding ways to attract a man, attract positivity and friendship, for the journey to love may be a long one, but no road is long when you have good company.

Melting like the inside of a grilled cheese sandwhich!

So, It's hot ass hell in Empty-L today, and there's not a damn thing we can do about it, but hide in the mall, cause most of us regualr folk lack airconditiong!, (It doesn't count as yours if you still live at home...nice try bruh!). So my girl and I came up with a wicked Idea for her 21st b day. SpliffOlympics daaaawwggggggg! (Tommy from Martin voice)!. What better way to test your athletic ability, than when your body is completely intoxicated, and it's so hot out you have to save your saliva for later! Yes yes, this is a rambling blog day for me. I have so many random things on my mind,...Like why is Cedric Diggory trending on twitter? Why are there photos of Philly Children playing with fire hydrants (Hazard no)?

In fact let's compose a list..shall we.

Things peopele should NOT be doing on a hot ass day like today!

1. Old people stay home, you fainting in the streets is causing traffic delays.

2. Calling in sick to work if you don't have an AC in your house, I'd rather be sick wit AC, than heat strucken at home.

3. If I see one person with socks on I will flip

4. Bringing your child on public transportation with your big ass truck of a stroller is unecesssary, there isn't enough air for you to be guzzling up space like that.

5. I get the fact that it's hot ladies, but it's Wednesday not Friday, bikini as outerwear in public places other than a beach/old port, or any place with an allotted tanning space, is weird, There are children around.!